Forget the Rest
(Modest Mouse - Float On)

So it's been a crazy busy couple of weeks at work. I'm fully engaged on a very complicated, under budgeted and poorly scoped project and I'm supporting an overseas client that does not know the meaning of a 12 hour time difference. I also have an internal project I'm working on and prepping for a presentation I'm doing at our annual company user conference. But enough of the bitching and complaining...

Just a few random observations from the past few weeks...

Have you ever noticed that whenever you order chicken nuggets from McDonald's that there's always that one person that asks you if they could steal a nugget? Now let's forget the simple fact that guys do not typically share food. The only time they share food is with women they're trying to get to sleep with them and women they're deathly afraid of (but still want to sleep with them). Now I'd like to propose a simple rule that we should live by here and please remember this one well.

Thou shalt not ask a man for a chicken nugget if he has ordered a 6-pack lest you want to be punched in the face. The punching in the face part may be a bit harsh but have you ever tried to take food from a dog that's hungry? They will bite your finger right off. A 6-pack is about the exact size to satisfy a man's appetite. A 10-pack at times I feel is slightly overeating unless I'm starving. 5 nuggets would simply be one short of being full. You never want to just partially fill a man's stomach up. That's like a torturous game of "just the tip" in the bedroom. I don't think I can drive that analogy home any clearer. Sharing a 10-pack = ok. Sharing a 6-pack = punch in the face.

Second thing I noticed this week is that just like Seinfeld said, muffin-tops are really the best part of a muffin. I can't tell you how painful and anti-climactic it is to finish off the bottom of the muffin. I mean you have to peel the paper off and then it's all soft and crumbles in your hand. It's not ideal to eat at all. I mean the best part about the muffin-top is that it's crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside. It allows that nice contrast and makes half the mess the bottom of the muffin makes! Someone seriously needs to open up a Muffin-Tops Store near my place. They could sell muffins and low-riding jeans!

Third and final thing I thought about this week is how it used to be cool to wear messenger bags; satchels; manpurses. From what I remember it was definitely cool in university. Now when I wear a sidebag of any sort, unless it's for work, I feel completely out of sorts. Like I'm some sort of lost soul. Which brings me to my 2nd rule of the week.

Thou shalt not wear a messenger bag/satchel/manpurse unless work calliths upon thee. It is also appropriate to wear one on a long soul-searching journey like Kwai Chang Kain.



However, this is only appropriate if you cannot find a stick and a large tied up handkerchief for the journey like this guy.



It is definitely inappropriate to wear one out on a social event.



Not cool man. Not cool.

Lastly I'd like to mention that I'm still on the p90x wagon and so far I've lost about 2 lbs in about a week, though that could simply be because people have been stealing my nuggets. Hopefully by the end of this week I can gauge to see if I've actually made any improvements on my weight and fitness. Talk to you all soon.